The Real Reason You Aren't Wealthy (Yet)
"Put down that $8 latte! That's the reason you're broke!"
You skim over the words in a magazine supposedly about life and wellness while waiting in a checkout line for - you guessed it - a latte and pastry. You know you shouldn't be spending $15 on a midday pick-me-up, but you work so hard! You deserve it, right?
"Besides, everyone should have some JOY. Life can't be all sacrifice all the time," you tell yourself. You check out and immediately feel buyer's remorse. Maybe the magazine was right.
I have great news for you. Your Starbucks habit isn't your problem. Your fear of money is. Your scarcity mindset is. It's not lack of budgeting that keeps you stuck; it's that you don't even know you're stuck.
Let's perform a mental exercise. What do you consider "a lot" of money? $100,000 per year is a common benchmark. Do you earn that much? Do you want to?
What do you think about earning $100,000 in a month? What about $100,000 in a day? In an hour? In one sale?
To most people, these are ridiculous numbers. After all, you're not a tech mogul or Warren Buffet, right. NORMAL people just don't make a lot of money. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the median household income in 2019 was $65,712.You can't just walk up to your boss and demand a raise. You can't just call up your clients and double your rates. No, success takes time- or at least that's what you've been told! You wait 30 years and accept a 2% cost of living adjustment per year and eventually you can afford to pay off your small home and send 1 of your 3 kids to college. It's the American way.
You are as great as you perceive yourself to be. Don't let old narratives hold you back.
Except, you're drowning in debt. You barely have $20,000 in your 401(k) after taking out that loan for repairs to your house. The pandemic has crushed your savings, and you're tired of working at a job that doesn't serve you, or building a business that is doing the opposite of giving you the freedom you desired when you started. However, you want to be grateful. So many people are doing worse and you don't want to seem unappreciative.
THIS IS THE TRAP THAT KEEPS PEOPLE BROKE! THIS IS WHY PEOPLE STAY STUCK!
There are 3 things you need to do if you want to create wealth for yourself and family:
In order to change the financial landscape of your life, you first have to believe there is more money available to you. Set aside your current salary and envision yourself in the lifestyle you DESIRE. How much money would you need to earn to make that happen? Brainstorm: How can you move into a position or create a business that generates that number. Set all excuses aside and PLAN.
Create a positive outlook on wealth. What does this look like? For starters, stop hating rich people. We have placed poverty on a pedestal in this country and treat being broke like a case of persistent acne in high school - irritating but inevitable. All rich people aren't bad and all poor people aren't good. As long as you see the rich as evil, you'll morally never align with the idea of earning lots of money. The truth is, most of us don't ever make $1 million dollars per year in our business because we didn't try to. Hard to hit a target you didn't aim for!
Stop beating yourself up. Women especially fall prey to imposter syndrome, which is feeling like a fraud or poser even when there is quantifiable evidence of our success. We use weird excuses for why we don't deserve more money to justify our situation, like having kids as a teenager or filing bankruptcy. Newsflash: Everyone has made mistakes. You are STILL worthy of wealth. I don't care what story you've been telling yourself, you can create the lifestyle of your choosing. In fact, you are the only one who can.
Now, if you've gotten this far, you almost certainly think I'm crazy. However, you're intrigued enough to keep going. You're starting to think this could actually happen. You could hit a crazy money milestone this year!
But how? Well, it really boils down to your money story. When you were born, you didn't know what money was. It was likely introduced to you as a child. Also likely is that negative emotions were immediately attached to money - or your family's lack thereof - and these vignettes started to frame your narrative around money.
For instance, did your mother tell you that "Money doesn't grow on trees!"? That's a fear-based statement. Money, in fact, does grow on trees. People use money to solve their problems everyday, which is why convenience stores, hairdressers, and swanky country clubs exist. Therefore, your ability to earn money is only limited by the number of problems you can solve in the marketplace. There are limitless problems in humans' lives; therefore an endless supply of money for you to make. That old narrative that money is limited, scarce, hard to get, hard to keep, the root of all evil (misquoted from the LOVE of money is the root of all evil), etc., keep you poor. You believe those things not because they're true, but because they're pervasive.
Pull out a pen and paper and start writing down the money story that was handed to you. I'll start you off with some of my client's most common limiting beliefs:
You have to work hard to make money
Patriarchy keeps women from making more money; there's nothing you can do about it.
You don't have any skills or talents worth money
It's harmful/hurtful to take money from people in exchange for goods/services (i.e. you're afraid of sales)
No one would buy from you
You're not old enough/smart enough/young enough/pretty enough to be in business
Everyone hates their job. There's no point in looking for something else.
Most people are middle class. There's nothing wrong with it.
God doesn't want you to have lots of money. He prefers you to be poor.
I want you to know that these are just feelings and opinions, not facts. You control the opinions you hold in your mind. You can re-write your money story to one that serves you! You can create a destiny of material wealth. Start asking what YOU want, regardless of outside opinions. Stop asking friends and family who are in your socioeconomic situation for advice - find people who are already where you want to be and ask them for help. Your parents meant well when they raised you, but if their advice is to stay at a $21/hour deadend job for "security,” stop taking their advice. I want to normalize conversations around abundance and ambition.
Write down all the reasons you'll never be a millionaire. Now strike through ALL of these excuses and go get this money! You are as great as you perceive yourself to be!
TLDR: Discover the mental barriers holding you back from wealth: fear of money, scarcity mindset, and imposter syndrome. Learn to reshape your money story, foster a positive outlook on wealth, and embrace your worthiness to unlock financial success.
Natalie Bullen is a Sales Coach, Wealth Strategist, and owner of Unapologetic Wealth. As a powerhouse coach and consultant, she positions her clients for wealth by accelerating their revenue with high ticket sales. Ready to shatter your previous revenue targets? Learn more at www.unapologeticwealth.com
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